when keepin' it real goes all the way wrong

One day during the last weeks of senior year, I was walking to the BC to do only God knows what when I spotted my boo. Let's call him KCJR.

Mr. KCJR said he was on his way to make a video to support Alumni Giving. How noble of him. He said they needed a girl in the video. I insisted that I was not that girl. Explained that besides the fact that I'm not really dressed, my hair looks a mess, I'm sober, and above all, I'm way too shy. He heard none of it and soon enough I was at some makeshift set with agressive lighting and a video camera. I panic internally, I've seen this ending on late night Cinemax. Or in stepshow videos.

Well I was wrong. This ending was way worse.

Thankfully I can laugh at myself. Enjoy what is certainly my first and last foray into acting. Feel free to leave comments about how I should've headed straight to Dillo after for death by Captain Morgan.



And yes, I remained friends with sir KCJR despite this. I even follow him on Twitter.

Dear Duke

when I graduated last year I thought my world was over. for six years, my life was about duke-- first two years tryna figure out how to get there, and the last four figuring out how to stay. to say graduation was bittersweet would be inaccurate. more like bitter. I wasn’t done there. there was so much left to see, do, take advantage of. at the very least, there was a half-empty bottle of captain at dillo waiting for me with my name on it. but 11.may.08 came and it was a wrap. was this what it felt like to be evicted?

so I tried to beat them at their own game and returned to campus every chance I could get. homecoming. vacation days and money to burn. roundtrips, roadtrips, I was there. but it’s not the same. hasn’t been the same. won’t be the same.

though things have changed and I can’t spend 24/7, damn near 365 with the people I’ve come to love dearly, I recognize that I was fortunate enough to not only attend what I deem to be the best school in the world, but most importantly, the best school for me. it’s not just course offerings, facilities, extracurriculars, and that other shit they sell you in the catalogue. it’s about the people. my classmates. all 6,000+. some of the smartest, most ambitious and talented people you’ll ever meet. my best friends are beasting med school, law school, grad school, wall street. and I’m gonna go ahead and dust my shoulders off for scoring a pretty sweet advertising gig. they’re chapter president. nphc president. student government president. they’re all kinda a big deal.

the greatest part? we’ve only just begun.

I’m excited to see who becomes the next big Hollywood director. Surgeon General. Media Mogul. President of the United States.

and the next big rapper.

meet anthem. an incredibly gifted wordsmith who got his start on the poetry scene, going in beast mode for the Sigma’s “Roc Da Mic” sessions. in the pursuit of happiness, he quit his day job to share his gift with the world.



please press play. it's his first single "Bachelor's Anthem" and i'm dead from the intro.

visit www.iamanthem.com for some great music.

so to my old workout buddy, good luck and, of course, stay gassed, boo :)

there go those Duke kids again. we’re taking over.

chris.

Saturday morning, he woke up, went to the bathroom.

being the mischievous person that I am, I ran into his room, into his bed, under his covers. to hide.

"boo!"

nothing like seeing a 6'5" man get startled and run away on his tippy toes from the sight of a woman in his bed.

or maybe it was me.

continued...

14 April 2009

here we were, four different people, four different experiences, yet together forging deeper relationships because of this one thing we had in common. We got lost in hours of conversation. no ipod, just talking. laughing. agreeing. disagreeing. and this is what I miss. getting to know new people. old people. learning a new perspective. re-evaluating my current stance. justifying my opinion. relating to others. agreeing to disagree. that's what I learned in my four years and it pained me that 10 May 08 brought the end of that as I had always been cognizant of the fact that I only had four years to make the most of the experience. that on 11 May there'd be no more disturbing the peace in Perkins. spending a week in Dillo. there'd be no more black bench. and no more 5am in the BSA office.

I went to bed at 2:30am tonight. there was wine. conversation. a visit from Rudy. explaining Prep. hopes and dreams. Paris. art. the Olsens. I left work at 8 with the intention of being in bed by 9 to make up for the lack of sleep of the previous night. and though it's another night of less than sufficient sleep, I feel hopeful that there is, indeed, life after Duke.

#15. I wish I could turn the clock back to August 04 and do Duke all over again.

There were those nights in Pegram spent in the common room, fiercely debating whether racism still exists and if there's still a need for affirmative action. or shrouded in darkness, silent, save for a few whimpers ellicited by The Notebook. and then we'd move upstairs, flying high above the sky, dying while Peter told us what really grinds his gears oblivious to his infant son plotting his mother's demise. and then there was the torrential downpour which turned East Campus into a hippie commune as we used trash bags to create slip-and-slides and danced in the rain.

Katrina. we were sophomores, arguing whether or not it was appropriate for Kanye to announce, in a live telethon to raise funds for the victims, that "George Bush doesn't care about black people." we watched them lock up Rick's and throw away the key, never to see another midnight waffle. we enjoyed owning the campus because the new freshman did little to detract from our brilliance.

junior year. the amazingness that defined the class of '08 was on full display as we dominated every leadership position available. an alcohol-fueled Super Soaker drive-by down Campus Drive on LDOC because we could. passing out minutes later and waking up at 11pm, only to realize that I slept through Common. and I had somehow managed to convince myself that it was okay to be bff with people in '07 because they'd never graduate. and then 12 May 07 came and I saw 12 of my favorites lining the steps of Page, ready to move on with their lives. I saw my loves walk down the aisle and all I could do was cry.

O-Block. 215 Alexander C's open door policy that introduced me to the greatness of PS3 and tennis. jay-z rap-alongs. taaaaailgate. slumber parties. the fashion show. senior year. a fierce urgency to carpe diem because the clock was ticking and my time at Duke would be up faster than virgin peen in tight poon.

from the moment I stepped foot on campus six years ago, I needed Duke to be mine. it felt like home. everything I wanted and needed in a school. gorgeous campus. warm weather. top-tier academics. school spirit. diversity. it was the antithesis of Hewitt, and, approaching my final year at that school, I knew I was ready for something different.

I'd hate to hear my classmates complain that Duke was wack because it was obvious that the problem wasn't the school, but them, as they all sat waiting for every opportunity worth taking advantage of to barrel through their dorm room doors. the same people are now begging in vain for God, or anyone listening, to turn back the hands of time. where just a year ago, I was climbing the chapel, standing at the highest point of the university, looking out at the vast expanse that I conquered. in a tutu. where I faced challenges thrown at me and emerged victorious, and with a degree to prove it. and though there were tears and hardships, triumphs and epic fails, I loved every second of it.

and that's why I've been back three times since I've graduated. because with each visit, I hope to wake up from the nightmare I'm currently starring in, to hop out my extra long twin bed in 208 Pegram, to turn my swag all the way on, a bright-eyed freshman who can't tell the difference between Alpine Atrium and Alpine Bagels.

an hour into an 8-hr road trip back up North, Shani, Bridgey, Kiya and I reflect on what Duke meant to us. what we loved, what we hated, what we regretted, what we were grateful for. and yet the jewel of the conversation came not in what we looked back on, but in what we were looking forward to. Shani, a year away from a Master's. Bridgey, Madame CJ Walker 2.0. Kiya, Dr. Boyd. and only Lord knows where I'm headed, but it's certainly gonna be fabulous. it was more than obvious that our time at Duke needed to come to an end, because here were four incredible young women who had learned so much, accomplished so much, all of whom had only closed the initial chapters, itching to start writing the next.

i'm ready to move on.