patience is a virtue

I've been over my living situation for at least four months now. it's tough living with a selfish, frigid bitch who thinks it's okay to move her boyfriend in without consulting me, then when he moves out suggests splitting the rent, which was raised once the boyfriend got added, three ways with our other roommate, so that I could be paying more than before Tyrone moved in. honey, it's a recession and homie don't play that.

it's tough when I have company and the FB thinks it's polite to be impolite. or insists on leaving her hair all over the shower. and leaves candles burning unattended. and takes the smoke detector down. and can't even look me in my face when I'm speaking to her. over it. but the lease isn't up until july and the soonest I can slip out is june. so now what?

and this whole going natural thing... the woman who's become so close to our family because she's been tending our tresses for over five years has been so unsupportive to the point of disrespect. so now not only am I starting from square one with my hair, but I have to start over with a new stylist. and I just don't have the time and money that goes into experimenting and figuring out what works best for my hair's mystery texture. going natural is hard to do when you don't know what you're doing besides waiting for some hair to grow. so now what?

and i'm also waiting for these last few pounds to melt away. and to be playing the game well enough to advance to the next level. i know my destination but I'm just not there...

and it's killing me.

just so overwhelmed by the process, the transition, that even though I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, it seems like I can't get out fast enough, and the only thing that keeps me going is knowing that nothing happens before its time. nothing.